A writer’s block

These days I feel like
I don’t remember how to write anymore
When I wanted to scribble few lines for you
I sat up with a blank page on my phone notes open
Staring at the bright screen
With my eyes too tired from all the pain
Wondering what words could fit
In rhyme and scheme
With metaphors and alliterations
And all those heavy figures of speech
Making one complete picture
Of how and what I feel for you

After minutes ten or twenty
I just knew I can’t
Even if
I mumble words so hazy
In my drugged sleep,
Or think it through
On my most sober Monday evening
Empty my entire vocabulary
On a blank white paper
Or insert the list of the most beautiful words
Nothing could comprehend
The ardency of my feelings
Nothing could decrypt
The coded signals in my heart
All simple and binary
In patterns so complex
Like creepers growing on your window pane
And tangled hair on a winter afternoon
Like jumbled words on a scrabble board
And hearts intertwined in love
My love for you
I wish could be plain and bare
And not the haphazard mess it is
Of sugar and pepper on the same plate

I have failed to give in
To the theories of bonding of hearts,
Written researches of human emotions,
Articles stating the “7 signs you’re in love”
And classic romcom endings
I have denied myself
Of every thought and word
Which spells love as elementary
For you I have learnt
The ZYX of life
And that there’s a U Turn
After every heartbreak

Will you let us remain tangled and complex?
A continuum to happiness and life
Can we “waste time chasing cars”?
And let loose the fears we have within us
Embedded deep within our hearts
Like embroidery on a cashmere dress
Will you let go of the conventions you learnt about love?
And ride with me through this rollercoaster ride of zigzag slides
Will you be the subject, which curbs all of my writer’s blocks?
Cause, who knows? Maybe I can always write for you.

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